Monday, January 19, 2009

Ex Boyfriend Debris

So what do I do with the debris of relationships past?
I have had 3 long-term relationships in my life, each of them adding to the cache of ex-boyfriend junk that is (mostly) stashed in boxes in my childhood bedroom at my parents' house. From time to time, I go through and sort some things out, releasing into the landfill memories that I once thought were too dear to part with.
I have realized, in reviewing this junk over time, that it can be overwhelming, so I have devised a method by which I do a number of "passes" through the junk in question. I conduct an initial review, where I can assess the junk and devise a plan of attack. The second pass is sometimes easier, as I now have a base line for what should be pitched and what should stay. Sometimes, there is an additional layer of organization thrown in, that gives me a feeling like I am in charge of the clutter and know what to do next. Every now and then, I am able to upend a box into a trashcan, but that is the exception, rather than the rule.
So the most recent breakup was (sadly) over 5 years ago but the debris lingers on. I was still living at home when it happened, so I think that's how it became encapsulated in boxes that haven't moved ever since. Part of me wants to keep this stuff: cards and notes, rants and visitor passes to the gated community he lived in (sick that I would still have all of this, I know). It reminds me of how a (dysfunctional) relationship works. Part of me wants to burn it all a-la Tai "rollin' with the homies" in Clueless.
What do "normal" people (read: non-packrats) do with this stuff?

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